Creating a Classroom of Student Vulnerability and Growth
by Lorraine Connell founder of Peers not Fears, Teen Leadership Coach
How often do you find yourself sharing and expressing vulnerability in the classroom? For many teachers, the idea of opening up can feel risky—something I understand well. It’s common for educators to feel that showing vulnerability might compromise their authority. Yet, keeping our guard up sends a message that students, too, should avoid vulnerability, and soon, everyone is operating behind a mask. This unintended barrier creates a divide that can stifle open communication and authentic connection.
Revealing the Masks
After COVID lockdowns, one of my student leaders, Avery Forrestal, helped me see this. He pointed out that even as we shed our physical masks, students continue to wear figurative ones, masking emotions to feel safe. His observation—shared on my podcast—was eye-opening: students, like adults, instinctively protect themselves from perceived exposure risks. Listen to his interview here.
Teenagers face a unique challenge. They’re at a stage where they’re exploring their identities, learning to fit in, and handling complex emotions. Vulnerability requires courage, but it’s a courage often uncelebrated. Educators frequently admire thought leaders like Brené Brown, who champion the power of vulnerability, yet we must ask ourselves: Are we creating classrooms where students feel safe to be vulnerable? I realized I wasn’t, and I wanted to change that.
Empowering Growth Through Challenge Zones
In my early teaching years, I hesitated to take risks in the classroom, fearing my ideas might be met with skepticism. However, I recognized that if students are going to step out of their comfort zones, they need adults to model vulnerability first. Seeing adults take risks and succeed—or learn from mistakes—empowers students to step into their challenge zones, pushing their limits in a safe, controlled way.
One approach I use is the "Stepping Beyond Comfort" exercise. Students identify where they feel safe, challenged, or at risk in various scenarios. These zones help them understand that comfort can be a plateau and that stepping into a challenge zone fosters growth. I encourage students to help peers move from a risk zone back to the challenge zone, creating a supportive, compassionate environment for growth.
The Role of Mistakes in Learning
Encouraging mistakes as part of the learning process is equally vital. Students feel more comfortable taking risks when they see their teachers or classmates stumble and recover without shame. One practice that has worked well in my classroom is the “favorite wrong answer” exercise. I invite students to share wrong answers and explore the learning moments they reveal. These “exploration days” help students see mistakes as learning tools rather than failures.
This small shift in approach demonstrates that making mistakes doesn’t need to lead to judgment but can instead be a part of growth. It also models for students that everyone has room for improvement, opening the door to questions, exploration, and authentic engagement with the material.
Modeling Vulnerability
My teaching journey has shown me that the reluctance to show vulnerability can send an unintended message: that mistakes are unwelcome. Modeling vulnerability—taking risks and acknowledging my own mistakes—signifies to students that it’s safe to do the same. When teachers model authentic learning and growth, students begin to see vulnerability as a strength rather than a weakness.
Being open about my own challenges was initially uncomfortable, but it transformed the way students engaged with me and with each other. By modeling vulnerability, I create a classroom culture where students feel free to step into their challenge zones, knowing they won’t be judged but rather supported and encouraged to grow.
Empathy as the Foundation for Vulnerability
Empathy is essential to creating a space where students feel comfortable taking risks and showing vulnerability. When students feel that their teachers and peers truly understand their struggles, they’re more likely to engage and be open. Practicing empathy requires genuine effort to understand each student’s perspective and offer support, creating a foundation of trust and understanding.
Fostering empathy in the classroom allows students to recognize that everyone faces challenges, even those who may appear confident or put-together on the surface. It bridges divides, making the classroom a shared space where vulnerability and growth are not just encouraged but celebrated.
Building Empathy Among Students
Creating empathy between students is essential for building a supportive environment. Structured dialogues where students share stories of personal challenges can foster understanding and respect. Activities that encourage students to consider another person’s perspective broaden their emotional intelligence, creating a culture of sensitivity and mutual support.
Empathy-building exercises, like “gratitude circles” or perspective-taking scenarios, encourage students to acknowledge each other’s experiences. These activities cultivate emotional awareness, a critical skill for both leadership and personal growth, and help students feel less isolated in their struggles.
Modeling Empathy as a Teacher
Teachers who approach students’ mistakes with empathy model a positive way to respond to setbacks. By sharing my own challenges and allowing students to see that teachers, too, make mistakes, I demonstrate that learning is an ongoing process. This approach builds rapport and trust, showing students that they are supported, even when they stumble.
Encouraging open discussions and sharing my own experiences reinforces a learning atmosphere where vulnerability and empathy go hand-in-hand. When students see me showing empathy, they’re more likely to extend it to each other, building a supportive community that values growth over perfection.
Empathy in Peer Interactions
Empathy also enhances peer relationships, making collaborative activities more effective and enjoyable. When students practice empathy in group settings, they become better communicators and team players. Active listening, asking thoughtful questions, and appreciating diverse viewpoints are skills that foster trust and open dialogue. These skills can carry over into students’ personal lives, equipping them for leadership roles where empathy and respect are essential.
By making empathy a central value, we create classrooms where students feel secure to show up authentically, face challenges, and take risks. This foundation encourages vulnerability, empowers students to grow, and creates a classroom culture where everyone—students and teachers alike—can thrive in authenticity and mutual support.
Encouraging vulnerability and empathy in the classroom can transform student relationships, cultivate leadership, and create a powerful community of learning and growth. This shift requires courage and consistency, but the rewards are seen in every student who steps into their challenge zone, supported and confident. By embracing these practices, we create classrooms where every student can learn and grow in a safe, nurturing environment.
This blogpost was originally posted here!
Learn more about and how to work with Lorraine Connell here!
Please note that the blogpost above does not represent the thoughts or opinions of Fresh Start Registry and solely represents the original author’s perspective.