Conversations on Pregnancy and Infant Loss: CJ’s Story

A Fresh Story, season 4, episode 6

October is Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness Month, and we’re honored to hold space for these profound stories. These stories may be of grief, but they are also of hope, resilience, and most of all, unconditional love. As a reminder, be gentle with your heart, and if you are not able to listen to this episode at the moment, we understand and we are holding you close. We know these conversations will change you as they have changed us.

Ashley Spivey is like the older sister that you always wanted, and never know how much you needed, until you meet her, and you wonder how you ever survived without her. Ashley is one of those rare gem humans who is an actual angel on earth. She spends her time on the internet helping people, educating people, and making sure everyone feels supported, heard, and validated. I’ve been following Ashley for years, as she has wonderful book recommendations, and I remember how excited I was for her when she announced she was pregnant. And then, months later, Ashley shared that her son CJ had been stillborn on November 26th, 2020. My heart dropped. In true form, Ashley shared her experience of losing CJ with honesty, authenticity, and reverence for her grief and unconditional love for her son.

When I think of Ashley, I think of the quote, “maybe you’ve been assigned this mountain to show others it can be moved,” and Ashley has dedicated her life to honoring CJ by changing the world in major ways, including working on bills to change policy for bereavement leave for parents, and education support on stillbirth. I talked to Ashley about leaving the hospital without her son, the impact of social media on processing CJ’s death, pregnancy after loss, and how she connects with CJ every day.

I’m so proud of Ashley for using her voice to honor CJ and to support so many people. It’s an honor to know Ashley and hold space for CJ’s story. This conversation will change you, as it has changed us.

Ashley, thank you for sharing CJ with us. We will remember him always.

You can learn more about Ashley on Instagram.